31.10.2019

You ever just take a minute to just stop and think about certain things
Life is something else and often I wonder how others interrupt it
Life
I really question if I’m doing anything right, a lot of things happen that makes me think I’m doing everything wrong
If I were to speak my truth other would probably think I’m “strong”
And I don’t know why, some things I can’t get out without having to cry


I’m back at a place where I have nothing to say, I feel no way, and I’m just taking it day by day.
I’m missing something. I feel empty, incomplete, and like I’m wading in the shallow waters of misery I can feel what I lack but I know for a fact…and it stops right there because I don’t know.


As a piece of me


For me to be so sure of myself, I sometimes question my ability to be anything due to the fact who’s the most important to me relatively hates me.


I rub my head a lot, to sweep away my thoughts
I’ve learned to just shut my eyes for a short period of time, It prolongs the cry
sometimes I don’t speak, I’m usually trying to figure out what’s wrong with me
I listen to a lot of music, it’s always been there if nothing else


I’m trying but it’s starting to get a little emotionally hard which causes me to creatively starve


Currently I’ve been thinking and not feeling so it’s a disconnect
When my mind starts to dwindle down and rest my feelings will more than likely reset
As of late I’ve been trying to make sense of instead of being sensible
I’ve been doing the bare minimum as a distraction to focus on why I’m in such a blank place


I’m trying.


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